Closing chapter

I made it through all the anger.
Through a five hour plane ride, two finals, and a lack of sleep.
I'm on the other side of the country from you- I even dipped my fingers in a different ocean in the hopes that it would wash away the memories written on the lines of my fingerprints

You told me that in my own way with my own voice, I saved your life.
you said to remember to take the lightbulbs with me under my fingertips because it would help knowing my hands know the way.
You reminded me not to forget to use my voice and asked me to save somebody for you out there.
you thanked me. for being born.

I deleted your text messages.
All of them.
I had them saved for the last seven days as a reminder of that late night call
when I told you everything that my hands were afraid to write
I said how much I wanted to see you again
but I knew it wouldn't happen.

I still miss you, I miss your touch, your laugh, your voice
the way that you would get really quiet and speak to me softly
kiss my wrists when I had my hands on your shoulders

You told me that you couldn't give me anything
so I didn't ask you to
but I gave you all that I could.
I wanted you to have anything that could help soothe the anger behind your eyes

So here's to the future
to not knowing when our paths will cross again
and I'm alright if they stay separated
because you're part of the story that I'm still writing.